Sunday, December 22, 2024

the corporate I wish to work for employs a man who’s abusive to ladies on relationship apps — Ask a Supervisor

A reader writes:

I’ve a difficult scenario involving prior sexual harassment/creepy conduct by a possible future coworker at a job I’m making use of for.

A yr in the past, I matched with a person on a relationship app who works in my (very small) area. The dialog was nice however we by no means met up and ultimately misplaced contact. Months later, he added me on social media and messaged me, primarily saying he was masturbating to my images. I blocked him. I additionally belong to one of many “Are we relationship the identical man?” Fb teams in my metropolis and he was additionally posted there for saying extraordinarily vulgar, demeaning issues to ladies on relationship apps. At the very least six ladies shared related interactions with him (with screenshot proof). Since then, he tried following me from a special account, which I additionally blocked.

Via LinkedIn (we now have mutual connections), I noticed that he began a job at an organization that’s doing a number of revolutionary work in our area. I’ve all the time dreamed of working there ultimately and a recruiter from that firm simply contacted me for a tremendous position on the identical crew he works on. I don’t know what to do. I’m so icked out on the concept of working with this disgusting man. Then again, I hate that I’m letting this man cease me from going for a job I really need.

Is there any approach I may report him for harassment and anonymously ship the screenshots to their ethics hotline earlier than even beginning? Or if I flip down the job, may I share this info with them? Is creepy conduct to ladies outdoors of labor even one thing firms can take motion on? All of it simply feels unjust.

Ugh, I’m so sorry. It’s not proper that you just’re reluctant to go after a job you need as a result of a creep works there.

Most firms received’t act on proof that an worker is a disgusting jerk on relationship apps. I’d argue that they need to, and your scenario is a primary instance of why: it should have an effect on who’s keen to work with them (and never simply potential staff, however potential purchasers too) and it raises questions on his potential to take care of feminine colleagues respectfully and professionally. However nonetheless, most firms received’t take into account it their enterprise until it reveals up at work indirectly.

Nonetheless, in case you’re supplied the job and switch it down, you can actually inform them why. They need to bear in mind that using this dirtbag is driving away good candidates (and it ought to make them query how he may be interacting with the ladies he works with as nicely).

You may be up-front with the recruiter that you just’d like to work for the corporate however you and different ladies have been harassed outdoors of labor by certainly one of their staff, and ask how carefully the place they’re hiring for works with this man.

Or, after all, you can go for the job, settle for it if you wish to, and after you’ve been there some time discreetly let different ladies know in regards to the jagoff they’re working with.

I’m sorry there aren’t higher options.

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